Who Is Josh Boldman?
So if you’re like most of the people who are looking at this page, someone has asked you the question that is a old as time itself:
“Who Is Josh Boldman?”
Now, don’t fret, for thousands before you have gone in search of the elusive answer to this very question, but you are in luck, for in the next few paragraphs, you will come to know all that you need to know to intelligently converse on the subject that is “Josh Boldman.”
We’ll start off with some of the simple stuff. Josh was born to Scott and Lisa Boldman (of the Ohio Boldmans) in the Year of Our Lord, 1985. After the age of five, he began rising through the ranks of the public school system at the alarming rate of one school grade for every calendar year. It was at that point that Josh decided it best to take summers off from school so that he would not find himself too far beyond the intellectual scope of his peers. And, as far as the most reputable records can tell, it is for this reason that students all across our great land enjoy what has come to be known as “summer break,” in honor of Josh Boldman, himself.
After graduating from the International Baccalaureate School of the now Historic Bartow High School (which, of course, became historic at the precise moment of Josh’s graduation), he then ventured on to a world unlike any other, a world of mystery, a world of wonder. Yes, he soon found himself on the doorstep (although there really was no actual doorstep) of Warner Southern College in Lake Wales, FL, which of course is located in Imperial Polk County (which only became Imperial upon Josh’s residence there).
Just before his graduation, young Josh found himself completely overcome by a rare beauty, like none he had ever seen before. Having already seen “The Notebook,” Josh knew in his heart of hearts that the lovely Rachel Hussey (of the Altamonte Springs Husseys) was to be his bride. After a lengthy engagement (which lasted the whole of three months), Rachel gave Josh her hand in marriage, and he has cherrished it ever since.
Josh and Rachel now find themselves as residents of Apopka (which is Creek Indian for “Place for Eating Potatoes”), FL where they are anxiously awaiting the arrival of their firstborn son or daughter, who is scheduled to make his or her entry into the world on April 21, 2008, a day to be set in the history books and to be celebrated as “Josh, Jr. (Unless It’s A Girl) Day.”
November 7, 2007 12:36 pm
This page reads like the script of ‘Pushing Daisies’. I love it.
November 9, 2007 12:33 am
ahhhh - The sound of a sweetest thing, silence of young l-o-v-e.
November 13, 2007 11:02 am
I need an about page like this! Amazing!
December 5, 2007 6:53 am
Now that you have seen the “legend”; you may want the truth…only the “Old Guy” knows…
April 16, 2008 12:38 pm
Nice!
*Wanted to mention that you spelled “off” as “of” in the fourth paragraph.
November 13, 2008 4:15 pm
this page is funny.. P.S. I love your priciest oil change story LOL I have a Beetle and I go to Valvoline for synthetic changes. It’s 65.00 but they do a great job.
November 13, 2008 8:21 pm
You left out the part of your life that was the most beneficial to your career as a host for a youth convention…the New Way luggage committee!
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